WHY 22 IS THE END: IF ONLY COMPLEMENTS WERE CURRENCY

As we've been droning away at work, Kristen and I have been noticing that complements have been pouring in from different directions this week. Here's a sample of a few:

- "Thanks so much! You're a STAR!"

- "Don't you look spiffy--have a date tonight?"

- "THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU"

- "I like that you always keep me guessing. Keep it up."

- "You explain this best."

- "Keep up the good work."

- "Thanks for coming in late last night and fixing something I forgot to do because I am incompetent and use you as a means by which to cover my ass so I can look great and you can look bad."

Now, as you can see, many of these are directed at work ethic. Others are aimed at appearance. Yet, none of them refer to anything beyond "I see what you did there--and it was good. I'm going to tell you and no one else of your excellence." This is totally fine...if we didn't crave raises more than the expired "as is" food we eat from our respective low-level super markets (because we can't afford anything else).

We're not saying to ban complements--we're just saying that if we had a bruise for every time we got a pat on the back, we'd practically be paraplegics. And, that is reallllllly annoying (as we've been working our jobs for well over half a year and we are still regarded as farts in the wind).

I don't know about Kristen, but I'm opening up a savings account at the American Bank of Complements, so I can save up, accumulate interest, and--eventually--be able to afford a hug (which is worth at least fifty complement dollars).